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Comments for 'Force Recon, Scout Sniper part 3' |
Jaywhit10
6:14 pm | July 16, 2004
Hey nice story, i've been reading it on my free time. It seems like its going to get better, i've always liked snipers, this is I believe another good series by you. Nice work.
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Pho
8:13 am | July 16, 2004
awww does our resident hard-core-SOB ODST have a soft side to him? haha jk.
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Helljumper
3:27 am | July 16, 2004
I'll start working on the next part when i get the time. I'm more interested in reading russ's story than writing my own.
ODST
hey relationships and love are wat make us human, its an important part of the story
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Wiley
12:12 am | July 16, 2004
a lime? As long as it involves Cortana i'm alright with it....mmm holografic....*snaps*
Anyway...yes...tell the mission soon..or else i'll be at the head of that angry mob.
9.8/10
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russ687
9:16 pm | July 15, 2004
I saw that comment you made Helljumper. Me turning into you? Oh come on! It's sooo obvious you're turning into me...lol
Nah, jk.
But I second what Berconius says: You're a really good writer, and I don't doubt you, but be careful about personal relationships in action stories. They can go sour and sappy if you're not careful.
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Berconius
2:45 pm | July 15, 2004
*sniff sniff* I smell a lime...?
Watch your step here, Helljumper, personal relationships are often cheesey when put in an action type story...but I trust you can make it work. And rememebr, cheesey limes are bad. Yu-ack.
*is clubbed to death, anyway*
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Pho
3:16 am | July 15, 2004
oh ok. cuz i thought miranda wasn't human since you wrote:
"If serving YOUR SPECIES is that," she paused searching for the right word. "Fun, I'm glad I signed up."
iono. but really kickass story nonetheless.
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Nick Kang
9:41 pm | July 14, 2004
LOL at CoLd!
The story was awesome and I loved it. Now tell me what their mission is! Although didn't it say something in the maker commentary about someone named Mirandr str--*gets smacked in the head by Helljumper's pro league and slumps to the floor unconscious.*
NK
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CoLd BlooDed
5:42 pm | July 14, 2004
Wow, that was awesome. Compared to your Battle for Techron, this is amazing work.
There were a few typos here and there, and some places where a comma or capital or apostrophe should've been. But otherwise it was great, you've gotten a real knack for writing.
It was just this sentence that scared me.
"Her feminine shape was hidden under her jump suit except for her ample breast. "
She only has one?! Is she some kind of genetic freak because I'm wondering if Deel noticed her uni-boob. Does he like that in a woman?
JK, just joking with you, great stuff, Helljumper, we really gotta do a series together... sometime. ;)
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romac1991
1:06 pm | July 14, 2004
damn your good Helljumper.
romac1991
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Helljumper
6:21 am | July 14, 2004
No she is human. If you didn't understand from the story, Ackerson asked her to do it. To form a relationship with Deel so that if shit goes bad ont he mission, he'll fight extra hard to get back alive for love.
ODST
Hey russ I prefer baseball bats
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russ687
5:09 am | July 14, 2004
I knew it! I knew it! The sniper mission is--
*Smacked in the head by one of Helljumper's golf clubs*
Ouch, was that nessicary? Everyone is dying to know--
*Get's taken out by a 9 iron*
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Pho
4:44 am | July 14, 2004
hey pretty cool story so far.
is miranda an android or something?
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Mainevent
3:25 am | July 14, 2004
Stop harassing me with this! Tell me there mission or DIE!!!
Anyway, it was pretty good. Overall nicely written. And I'm glad you did your homework.
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Helljumper
12:02 am | July 14, 2004
Russ hinted at it in my part 2's comments page
ODST
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Severian
10:42 pm | July 13, 2004
Great, although the tension is KILLING me. What's the sniper's mission!
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hunter_that_dances
9:52 pm | July 13, 2004
about damn time!
very good. keep em coming
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russ687
8:45 pm | July 13, 2004
Oh crap. OpeningAct is right...how could I let this slip through? If this drags out any longer Helljumper, you'll have an angry mob at your door step :)
"What's the sniper's mission?" Repeat.
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OpeningAct
7:53 pm | July 13, 2004
Very good, but I still don't know the sniper's mission. :( For some strange reason I've decided to give you a rating. 8/10 OA
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Helljumper
7:44 pm | July 13, 2004
As always thanx russ for the kind words. Where's everyone else?
ODST
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russ687
5:04 pm | July 13, 2004
Good job Helljumper. I liked the history of the sniper at the beggining, and the twist with that Miranda, boy I thought it was a little crazy but you made it turn out really Ackerson-like, nice.
Oh yeah, your spotter must have an uncle in the UNSC or something (see my story). Trust me, I had no clue and it was not on purpose.
Keep them coming. Oh yeah, first post!
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