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Comments for 'The Birth of New Heroes: Prologue' |
Connie
11:36 am | April 21, 2004
Just by reading the first paragraph I can tell its a historical document. Please dont tell me the rest of this story is going to be like this!
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Arinoth Koby
5:06 pm | April 12, 2004
Aha, thanks for the answer
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The Collector
1:28 am | April 11, 2004
Orphans are a language term. When u have one sentence that supposed to be linked to another but the linkin sentence is missing, Or you dont end the paragraph correctly and it leaves it sounding a lil weird.
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Arinoth Koby
9:16 pm | April 9, 2004
I knew I spelt that word wrongs, thanks for the comments though, I need to get around to writing the First Chapter.
Arinoth Koby
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The Razor
5:45 pm | April 9, 2004
Superb!Worthy a game of it's own.The idea is new and it's god and funnyand when you think someting is going to happend it dont.But it's MJOLNIR not MJONIR armor.
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Burny
9:52 am | April 8, 2004
I kno what it means (homeless, parentless child) but I thought he meant it in other terms...o_O
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Arinoth Koby
12:36 am | April 8, 2004
Thanks, I am using Micrsoft Word 2003 and what are orphans (and not the person)?
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Burny
9:34 pm | April 7, 2004
Orphans? Wtf are those?
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The Collector
7:39 pm | April 7, 2004
Wow i dont know what type of grammar software you were using but it was plagued with a few run-ons and fragments. You had a few orphans but other then that, really good story.
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Arinoth Koby
5:42 pm | April 7, 2004
Thanks, for the char description, they are actually descriptions done by my actual clan members for themselves (with me editing it to fit into the style i want it to appear in). Some differences in Canadian-American spelling is Honor-Honour, Color-Colour, etc, small things.
I will hopefully get to writting the first chapter once i finish a project and get some free time from work.
Arinoth Koby
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Burny
10:23 am | April 7, 2004
I liked this alot. It was very well written, the descriptions of the Shadow Spartans gave me a clear picture of each. I didn't notice any of the Canadian/American difference of words, too. Nicely done, my chap.
9.9/10
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Blood Wolf
8:22 pm | April 6, 2004
I liked the story line, but i think you need more of me in the story lol!!
BW
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Arinoth Koby
6:36 pm | April 6, 2004
Well thank you, and i don't know what you mean by interesting Sentinel, is it a good or bad thing?
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Sentinel
6:16 pm | April 5, 2004
Intresting...
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Agent Shade
5:53 pm | April 5, 2004
different writing style made it hard for me to read, but otherwise, it was good. unless someone else notices any spelling mistakes, i didn't see any
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